{"id":254,"date":"2024-05-07T18:46:01","date_gmt":"2024-05-07T18:46:01","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/jpbmetal.com\/?p=254"},"modified":"2024-05-29T15:52:19","modified_gmt":"2024-05-29T15:52:19","slug":"resisting-suicide-and-awakening-to-gods-presence","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/jpbmetal.com\/index.php\/2024\/05\/07\/resisting-suicide-and-awakening-to-gods-presence\/","title":{"rendered":"Resisting Suicide and Awakening to God\u2019s Presence"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Content warning:<\/em><\/strong>\u00a0This article contains multiple references to suicide. If you are experiencing suicidal thoughts and need to speak to someone immediately, you can call or text 988 for the\u00a0<\/em>988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline<\/em><\/a>\u00a0within the United States.<\/em><\/p>\n

As a young pastor, I was filled with vision, passion, and hope and wanted to change the world in Orange County, California. God was showing up, and great things were happening \u2014 when one day after church a lady asked me something that broke my theological bank: \u201cPastor Mike, as a young girl I was sexually abused by my brothers and friends many times. I cried out to God to help me and to make it all stop, but they kept abusing me. Can you help me understand why God didn\u2019t answer me? Because if I were a mom and my daughter was crying out for help, I would intervene. Why didn\u2019t God intervene?\u201d<\/p>\n

I was emotionally and theologically shell-shocked in that moment. I mentally sifted through my theological file drawer of biblical responses and came up with nothing to say except the three words I never wanted to say (because I feared they were true). Nonetheless, mustering up the courage, I responded, \u201cI don\u2019t know.\u201d<\/em> As her eyes softened, the Spirit suddenly gave me utterance and, with great emotion, I said prophetically, \u201cWhat I do know is that Jesus was abused and suffered, and He understands your pain, and I know He can heal you.\u201d<\/p>\n

That short and honest conversation led to a three-year healing journey of weekly meetings where we walked together into the pain of her life. To God\u2019s glory, she walks in freedom today.<\/p>\n

As my pastoral journey continued, so did the stories of darkness and pain. Suddenly I found myself walking with way too many people: My week was booked with 40 hours of counseling appointments with a waiting list six months long. What I did not expect to hear from so many Christ-followers was the depth of hopelessness that led many of them to contemplate suicide. These people and their stories left me deeply troubled and saddened; these once-hope-filled saints were so depleted that suicide felt like their only way out.<\/p>\n

These three stories give insight to the brokenness of many of the people I sat with, hearing their dark struggles with the seductiveness of suicide:<\/p>\n